Welcome to Shell Beach

dark_city_bluray

Hold onto your sanity, because Dark City is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the Bluray cover or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring guest hosts

Daryl Surat of AnimeWorldOrder and Mike Toole of Anime News Network.

Review in a Nutshell: Few works of cinematic speculative fiction deserve the word ‘visionary’ to describe their aesthetic. Dark City is one such film, although Paul deducts a few points for the bombastic nature of the movie’s conclusion.

This movie contains:

mind_lasers

Click the pic for MIND LASERS.

A Day in the Life of Tim Maughan (Inside Joke)

MaxHeadroom

Boot up your computer-generated parrots, because Max Headroom: 20 Minutes into the Future is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the Japanese DVD cover or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring Andrew from The Veef Show and Collection-DX.

Review in a Nutshell:  Low budget but groundbreaking, 20 Minutes into the Future is one of the few films that really deserves the term ‘cyberpunk’.  It has a droll, British sense of humor and great production design, and I highly recommend it to anyone that can manage to track it down.

Punching Snakemen, Savin’ the President

Hook up the electrodes, because Dreamscape is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie poster or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring Sean “Hollywood” Hunting.

Review in a Nutshell:  Aside from a questionable “dream invasion” or two, Dreamscape is a fun little film that plays with the idea of psychic powers and dream manipulation.  Despite having a small budget, it has numerous strong performances and some decent special effects.

This movie contains:

SCIENCE!

The nefarious George Wendt?

Tragic Snake Face.

(more…)

“Merry Christmas, You Filthy Man-Animals!”

Attach those alien nose-plugs, because Battlefield Earth is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie poster or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring guest cohost Max Dunn.

Review in a Nutshell:  Listen up, rat-brain!  Just because a movie has an incomprehensible plot, hammy acting, ridiculous dialog, and goofy special effects does not mean it’s not the Greatest Movie EVER!  Get that through your skull-bone!

Fun Fact:

The ”sharpened log fence” is actually called a “stockade”.

Square Pigs and Sexy Robots

Turn on your magnetic boots, because Space Truckers is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Review in a Nutshell:  Due to contributions from people as varied as Stuart Gordon and Hajime Sorayama, Space Truckers is light-years better than any low-budget, science-fiction adventure film has any right to be.  Its attention to detail and sardonic sense of humor make it a treat to watch.

This movie contains:

Square Pigs.

Pink Overalls.

Vernon Wells, Space Privateer.

The latest advancements in cybernetic male-enhancement technology.

Post Script:

This is what the good poster for Space Truckers looks like.

Put on Your Angry Face!

Retract your vibro-blades, because Guyver 2: Dark Hero is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Review in a Nutshell:   A low-budget, live-action adaptation of a long-running action / science fiction manga series by Yoshiki Takaya, Guyver 2: Dark Hero is buoyed up by great rubber suit special effects and an absolutely crazy stunt team.   Mike Dent of R5 Central guest stars in this episode.

This movie contains:

Angry Face.

ANGRY FACE.

Angry face?

Gay Fishmen?

Big Month of Dick – Blade Runner

Banner by LCOM

Describe in single words only the good things that come into your mind about your mother,

because Blade Runner is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Review in a Nut-shell: Visually visionary but emotionally distant, Blade Runner is a revolutionary piece of  science fiction and its impact on world of film is still felt to this day.

This movie contains:

Harrison Ford, Master of Facial Expressions.

HURRAY FOR UNICORNS!

RealDolls.

Tears in the Rain.

“Math is Hard.”

In the future Mars is a lot like Epcot, and Cowboy Bebop: Knockin’ on Heaven’s Door

is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Review in a Nutshell:  The Cowboy Bebop movie is basically an episode of the TV series extended out to feature film length.  Whether that’s its greatest strength or its greatest weakness is a matter of opinion.

Be sure to check out DAPD-DX’s review here and Dave and Joel’s take here.

This movie contains:

The Patented Ed-in-an-Amphora(TM).

Faye Valentine, Being Useless and Getting Kidnapped. (Again.)

Psychotic Villains.

“A man who was living in a dream…”

COMING SOON!

Daryl Surat invades GME! for another round of ‘feeding time at the @#$%ing zoo!’

Radiation-Munching Space Germs!

It’s time to pick on babies and monkeys, because

The Andromeda Strain is the Greatest Movie EVER!

This movie contains:

One Unfortunate Monkey.

SCIENCE!

Pyramid Head?

Your Tax Dollars at Work.

“Welcome to SNARF.”

The Greatest Movie EVER!

Keep your freaking flight mask ON,

because Wing Commander is the Greatest Movie EVER!

This movie contains:

KILLDOZER!

Space Kittens.

KILLDOZER!

SPACE BULLDOZER.

Final Thought:

“Oh, come on, Scooby Doo wasn’t that bad…”

COMING SOON!

We keep the pain train rolling full steam when Angel, George and I tackle

Dungeons & Dragons: Wrath of the Dragon God.

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 74 other followers