Halloween Double Feature!


As a special Halloween-themed treat (or is it a trick?), we declare that

Hocus Pocus and Empire of the Ants are the Greatest Movies EVER!

Reviews in a Nutshell: Hocus Pocus has Sarah Jessica Parker as a sorcerous seductress.  Empire of the Ants has giant, radioactive ants.  What more needs to be said?

These movies (respectively) contain:

ZOMG GIANT ANTS.

SATAN.

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11 Responses

  1. Giants and Sara Jessica Parker as a hot witch. Who can ask for a better Halloween treat.

    However, I must please ask the Goob not to rag on Skittles. Skittles rock. All must bow before the power of the Skittle and their dark companions, the gummy bears. Both of these fruit-based rule the candy world and I will tolerate nno disrepect hurled in their direction. Apologize immediately and pray the Dark delicious Overlords of Skittle and Gummy accept said apology and allow to breath another day.

  2. I saw ‘Empire of the Ants’ at a drive in movie festival. One of the coolest experiences ever.
    Any chance of a ‘Food of the Gods’ podcast?

  3. Early Halloween double feature nice! I guess this counts as episode 151 and 152 then? I wonder if you’ll do the comicbook thing and do a big one every 25 eps? Not sure how that would work … they’d have to be extra-great or Ultra-great movies.

  4. God, it makes me feel SO OLD when people talk about movies with Bette Midler and Sarah Jessica Parker as being during their childhood.

    ****

    Disney live-action is, really, made to fit in that wierd 5-PM-on-UPN time slot, when all the cartoons are over but it’s too early to start showing prime-time stuff. The big broadcast channels are rich enough to afford real movies, but there is a whole second tier where Disney live-action (and Sci-Fi Original Movies) live.

    Which means, of course, that they are indeed entirely forgettable. Nobody ever pays attention to that time slot; we’re just looking for something to do to stave off brain-death by boredom, before mom comes hom and makes dinner. (Homework? ho ho ho, you naive little fool.)

    In a way, though, these movies do us a service. They give older actors a quick paycheck, and they give younger actors a sort of “kiddie pool” that’s a step above TV shows but not all the way up in the Big Leagues where they expect a lot from you.

    ****

    Don’t even JOKE about “High School Musical: The Reunion”. You KNOW they’ve already got the contracts signed for that!

  5. I too love to watch horror Halloween movies. Happy Halloween…

  6. Man, I loved Hocus Pocus as a kid. The part where the immortal cat gets run over and then inflates is amazing when you are young.

  7. One nitpicky fantard complaint: ‘Salem’s Lot was set in Jerusalem’s Lot, Maine, and was about Vampires.

  8. Bite your tongue, lad! Night of the Lepus is a masterpiece.

    And for Thanksgiving movies — you’ll have to plumb a depth to which you’ve never had to sink before. Seek out Brad Grinter’s Blood Freak. I’ll say no more.

  9. Oh man, I just heard a disparaging word uttered about Home Alone! I need to hear a Home Alone podcast now.

  10. Perhaps in the same podcast he does Home Alone, the Goob can apologize to the gummy bears and Skittles for his harsh and totally unwarranted assault.

    Then we can dance, sing Koombaya, and wonder when someone in cable TV will get a clue and bring back MST3K

  11. I remember forcing my friends to see Hocus Pocus with me. We were in fourth or fifth grade and girl’s just started to be interesting to us. I remember that when they kept saying ‘no’ I appealed to the developing hormones and said: Sarah Jessica Parker is so hot in this movie. And god damn she was. Her appearance in this made me have a solid crush on her for years. . .I can’t say she is particularly hot anymore but for a time, at least during that film year, SJP was a box office draw for looks alone.

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