Jason Statham Drives a Car and Kills People

statham-chan2

This is the only picture that should be required to convince you

that Death Race is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Review in a Nutshell:  On one hand, indistinguishable gray vehicles firing machine guns at one another in an ash-colored soup of choppy action scenes.  On the other hand, Mario Kart power-ups and Robin Shou.  On the gripping hand, Jason Statham.

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11 Responses

  1. Thank you GOD for mentioning the female prisoners !

    I thought I was the only one who noticed that these extraordinarily attractive women could not have possibly come from a female prison. And if they did…they would have been eaten alive…I wanted to see some huge, butch, hulking woman, who could bench press a car. That would have been true entertainment. I think I will have to go see this movie now.

    In regards to where rap music comes from, I concur. When I walk down the street, Kanye West’s “Flashing Lights” usually plays from my nethers. It gets the boys. 🙂

  2. Hey, hot chicks go to prison, too! Didn’t any of you learn anything from the Roger Corman produced documentary films The Big Doll House and The Big Bird Cage?

  3. Hot chicks DO go to prison, it has been so noted, however, they usually don’t come out looking so hot…nor do they come out in hip huggers and belly tops. Some men come out of prison like that, but thats a whole nother topic…

  4. I’m curious if you’re ever going to review Series 7: The Contenders. It’s a film about people killing each other for entertainment of the masses, but its shot like an episode of Big Brother or Survivor.

    Also you should review $lasher$ due to its hillariousness.

  5. Daryl, did you really say Megan Fox and Angelina Jolie are unattractive? And you repeatedly mention how fantastic Jason Statham looks nekkid? I think I just identified the Machine Gun Joe of this podcast.

    Great show, by the way.

  6. I saw this on a double bill with ‘The Mummy 3’ at a drive in. It was bad, but enjoyable.

    I used to have the love/hate thing with Anderson, until he made AVP and forever tainted himself.

    ‘The Expendables’ is gonna be amazing, you guys should do a month or two where you review a movie from each of the actors in ‘the Expendables’.

    Rap Music Vagina Girl for the win!

    Sorry that was so disjointed, I was messed up from the awesomeness of this podcast.

  7. Re: Lovejoy Locked Up

    I am one of those who have not seen “Death Race.” I heard it was an extremely poor remake of “Death Race 2000” missing all the things you are Daryl mentioned and therefore is not worth watching unless you are attracted to Jason Statham, which I am not.

    Ian McShane. He was on an A&E British import in the 90s – the “Lovejoy” TV series. He talked to the camera all the time. I think this was done to give the same first person narration of the books. Joyjoy explained who characters are, what is going on – usually a con. Mostly, he was giving history lessons. It Is Important That the Audience Know Why This Antique Is Important.
    Towards the end they had some fun and had someone ask, “Who are you talking to?”

    Is there enough Ian McShane to watch the movie for?

  8. For the record, I’m the 14K of this podcast.

    Understand that my intense dislike for tattoos and body piercings makes me a lone voice of dissent for my generation, as it eliminates roughly every female in my age bracket from consideration. As such, there’s no way I was hard up for Statham in this movie, whose character has Megan Fox/Angelina Jolie-caliber bad tattoos.

    I implore skeptics and nonbelievers alike to consider how much CGI and makeup is required to actually make either Megan Fox or Angelina Jolie look human for movies. It requires substantially more work than is typically required for other actors. I’m told much of the commentary track for Tomb Raider is dedicated to this fact. I bet it’s all Oliver Stone talked about during his many Alexander commentaries.

  9. I agree on the tattoos, being from the mid-later 20’s generation I have a pretty strong disgust for them. Because it’s Jason Statham I can live with it but everyone else forget about it.

  10. Obviously you never saw the original! This one SUCKS BALLS compared to the OG!

    That hack Paul Anderson even removed points for peds! That whole bit is legend! Totally proving once and for all what a complete FUCKTARD Paul W.S. Anderson is.

    And chicks? The OG actually showed a fair amount of TNA! Where is it in this crapfest remake!

    Heh! Kiddies!

  11. And obviously you didn’t listen to the podcast. Daryl and I address our love for the original Death Race 2000, the point system, and our issues with the female cast in this film.

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