Monthly Archives: January 2008

Wax Off?

The Greatest Movie EVER!
Grab your TurtleWax and a bucket of paint, because
The Karate Kid is the Greatest Movie EVER!
This movie contains:
Young Love.
The World’s Evil-est Karate Instructor and his Aryan Horde.
Johnny. Evil, or Just Misunderstood?
An Academy Award Nominated performance by Noriyuki “Pat” Morita.
COMING SOON!
COMING SOON!
The Tingler is loose in the theater! Scream, SCREAM FOR YOUR LIVES!

Boas from Bulgaria, Pythons from Philly.

The Greatest Movie EVER!
We may be opening the flood-gates when we state
that Boa vs Python is the Greatest Movie EVER!
This movie contains:
MULLET OF CHAMPIONS!
Underwater Bulgarians.
Don't take a bet with a Dolphin Girl.
She’s a scientist. No, seriously.
Bill Pullman x Hugh Jackman = ?
He’s a scientist, too. They’re all scientists.
He's got a PhD in Internal Human Studies.
Even the snakes are scientists.
This movie also contains:
Yes, I am popular DJ! The crowds love me!
The fortuitous demise of the World’s Worst D.J.
COMING SOON!
Everyone knows that a Snake’s only natural enemy is a Crane…
COMING SOON!
SNAP!

“I’m going to kill them all, Sir.”

The Greatest Movie EVER!
Don’t shoot the fat kid, because Soldier is the Greatest Movie EVER!
This movie contains:
Jason Isaacs in Soldier
John Waters, Space Commando?
Ouchie.
Mild Eye Trauma.
Gary Busey in Soldier
Gary Busey, a nice man with happy feelings all of the time.
I <3 Kurt Russell
KURT “MADE YOU BLINK” RUSSELL.
COMING SOON!
An unofficial bonus episode, because you requested it…
COMING SOON!
DON’T SAY I NEVER DID NOTHIN’ FOR YA!