Don’t Worry, Kids; The Dolphins Survive

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Watch out for under-cranked stock footage from nature documentaries, because Jaws 3-D is (probably not) the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the title or the movie poster above to download our review of the film, featuring Matt “Saint Mort” Kelly from the Horror Movie Night podcast.

Review in a Nutshell: Hamstrung by an implausible premise and gimmicky 3-D camerawork, Jaws 3-D is arguably the nadir of the Jaws films. Despite a surprising amount of talent arrayed before and behind the camera, the film’s plot never quite hits its stride and the cinematography and special effects suffer from the de-conversion process. It’s an odd relic from an early Eighties 3-D revival that never got off the ground.

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The Mega-Low Down on the Megalodon in Mallorca.

Fuel up the helicopter, because Shark Attack in the Mediterranean is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie poster or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring M.O.M., the Mistress of Malapropisms.

Review in a Nutshell:  A perfect storm of hilarious dubbing and scenes lifted from other, bigger movies, Shark Attack in the Meditarranean, aka Shark Alarm off Mallorca, features surprisingly good CG sharks and the charming antics of bodybuilder-turned-actor Ralf Moeller.  As always, M.O.M. loves the scenery.

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The Napoleon of Underwater Fish Crimes

Don’t go in the water, because Jaws: The Revenge is (definitely not) The Greatest Movie EVER!

Click the movie poster or the link above to download our review of the film.

Review in a Nutshell:  Stock footage, dodgy editing, immobile shark props, and Michael Caine are a powerful combination indeed.  Watch it with someone you love; they will hate you for it.

This movie contains:

Mario Van Peebles, Black MacGuyver.

RUBBA-SHARK.

This will end well.

FINAL THOUGHT:

THIS is how you show sea-dwelling creatures who is boss.

Also, click HERE to see comedian Richard Jeni’s take on Jaws: The Revenge.