The Ballad of Duck Cheesecake

Hold onto you noses, because Conan the Barbarian (2011) is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie poster or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring Dave and Joel from Fast Karate for the Gentleman.

Review in a Nutshell:  Although the film contains good casting and some truly hilarious moments, the new Conan film is missing a certain something that puts our guest hosts ill at ease.  Paul still considers it to be the “feel-good family comedy of the year.”

Barbarian Smoochies

Break out your battle-axes, because Kull the Conqueror is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie poster or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring Sean “Hollywood” Hunting.

Review in a Nutshell:  Flaming swords.  Rubber demons.  Tia Carrere as an evil enchantress.  Kull the Conqueror is an unrelentingly goofy but fun little barbarian film.

Mom Chooses Mexico

Strap on your sandals, because Conan the Destroyer is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Review in a Nutshell:   It may not have James Earl Jones, but it has Grace Jones, and I think that more than makes up for it, thank you very much.

This movie contains:

Ahnold’s Hypno-Face.

Constipated Wizards.

Grace Jones being Crazy.

GORILLA WIZARD GHOSTS.

Addendum:  Scouring the Internet has uncovered this picture, evidence that suggests that Andre the Giant was in the fact the man in the Dagoth suit.

Are You Ready for Some Conan?

Strap on your fur loincloth, because Conan the Barbarian is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Review in a Nutshell:  By Krom, this movie is homoerotic!

This film contains:

Arnold Schwarzenneger in various fruity costumes.

James Earl Jones, Master of Mesmerism.

Trucker Mustaches.

Tremendous Snake Face.