Train Heist? Train Heist.

The cover of the Arrow Video Blu-ray release of Millionaires' Express, featuring a painted collage of the film's main characters and the titular train.

Hang on to your ill-gotten goods, because Millionaires’ Express (1986) is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the Blu-ray cover or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring guest host Daryl Surat of AnimeWorldOrder.

Review in a Nutshell: A slapstick comedy with an extensive cast list and some truly jaw-dropping fight scenes and stunts, Millionaires’ Express (1986) is an unusual, one-of-a-kind film that defies expectations at nearly every turn.

Maybe He Actually Does Care for Hunky Boys?

The movie poster for Psycho Goreman (2020) featuring the main cast of humans and monsters posing dramatically, rendered in a realistic, painted style.

Hold on to your interdimensional magical gems, because Psycho Goreman (2020) is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie poster or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring guest host Kyle “ChibiUFO” Foster.

Review in a Nutshell: A horror-comedy with the sensibilities of a Nineties kid’s show crossed with a video game (complimentary), Psycho Goreman (2020) has strong comic timing, great production design, and solid performances from its cast.

Christmas 2: Exploding Kinder Edition

The DVD cover of Santa Claus: The Movie (1985) featuring David Huddleston as Santa driving a sleigh loading with bags of toys.

Hold on to your candy canes, because Santa Claus: The Movie (1985) is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the DVD cover or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring Vtuber extraordinaire Sasquatchulous.

Review in a Nutshell: Despite strong production design and an endearing performance by David Huddleston as Santa, Santa Claus: The Movie (1985) is weighed down dozens of bizarre narrative and directorial decisions that make the film go down like a lump of coal in your stocking.

Insert Bee-Pun Here

The movie poster for The Beekeeper (2024), featuring actor Jason Statham wearing a bee-keeping suit breaking apart into a swarm of bees.

Hold on to your honey, because The Beekeeper (2024) is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie poster or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring Tom “Finalfuryk” Pandich.

Review in a Nutshell: An over-the-top action movie with hilariously retrograde politics, The Beekeeper (2024) is nonetheless a tremendously entertaining film.

Darkly Dreaming of the Suburbs

The movie poster for The People Under the Stairs (1991).

Watch out for booby-traps, because The People Under the Stairs (1991) is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie poster or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring guest host Zoe from the Internet.

Review in a Nutshell: While the horror elements of the film may seem tame by modern standards, The People Under the Stairs (1991) is buoyed up by strong performances, solid production design, and an absolutely scathing sense of social and political commentary.

Not in Kansas Anymore.

The movie poster for the 1985 children's fantasy film, Return to Oz, featuring the main cast flying above a fantasy castle on the back of the strange creature known as the Gump.

Hold on to your chickens, because Return to Oz (1985) is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie title or the poster above to download our review of the film, featuring Gerard (from Canada).

Review in a Nutshell: Sporting strong performances and impeccable production design and special effects, Return to Oz (1985) nonetheless failed to find its audience despite (or perhaps because of) serving as a sequel to the much-beloved 1939 film, The Wizard of Oz.

Gonna Need Bigger Guns

The DVD cover for Split Second (1992) featuring actor Rutger Hauer being stalked by a demonic monster.

Watch out for rats, because Split Second (1992) is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie title or the DVD cover above to download our review of the film, featuring guest host “Celebrity Translator” Neil Nadelman.

Review in a Nutshell: An unlikely mash-up of cyberpunk science fiction, buddy cop comedy, and supernatural serial killer movies, Split Second (1992) gleefully blends genres into a strangely compelling and fun little 90 minute romp. Come for the chocolate, stay for the anxiety.

A Triple Entendre?!

The movie poster for Bound (1996), featuring actors Jennifer Tilly and Gina Gershon.

Hold on to your ill-gotten gains, because Bound (1996) is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie poster or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring guest host Zoe from the Internet.

Review in a Nutshell: The directorial debut of the Wachowskis, Bound (1996) is a taut and economical neo-noir crime thriller with great performances, strong queer representation, and a surprisingly acidic sense of humor.

Like Wu-tang, Gamera is For the Children

The movie poster for the English language release of Gamera the Brave (2006).

Fire of up your flying turtles, because Gamera the Brave (2006) is the Greatest Movie EVER! Click on the movie poster or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring Tom “Finalfuryk” Pandich.

Review in a Nutshell: A kid-friendly film with a surprising degree of emotional depth, Gamera the Brave (2006) nevertheless failed to find its footing commercially and critically, and so it may end up being the final Gamera film ever produced…

Houston, We Have a Problem…

The VHS cover for I Come in Peace (1990).

Hold on to your compact discs, because I Come in Peace (1990), also known as “Dark Angel”, is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the VHS cover or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring guest host Alex Case of the Anime Explorations podcast.

Review in a Nutshell: An exuberantly goofy film, I Come in Peace blends buddy cop action with science fiction / horror elements and an acerbic sense of humor as well as strong casting. Come for the gangs of drug-peddling yuppies, stay for the mayhem.