The Only Thing More Treacherous than a Ninja is an Eggplant.

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Practice your secret techniques of Japanese rope-bondage, because Five Element Ninjas is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the DVD cover or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring M.O.M., the Mistress of Malapropisms.

Review in a Nutshell: Combining Chang Cheh’s trademark melodrama with superior athletic skills and hilarious gimmickery, Five Element Ninjas represents the Shaw Brothers at the height of their game as producers of top-quality kung fu films.

That’s Not Really What “Nonplussed” Means

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Get ready for improbable multiple weapon use, because The Legend 1 & 2 are both the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the DVD cover or the title above to download our reviews of the films, featuring Sean “Hollywood” Hunting.

Review in a Nutshell: Despite some misleading American packaging, The Legend 1 & 2 (aka Fong Sai-Yuk 1 & 2, aka The Legend of Fong Sai-Yuk 1 & 2) are a fun mix of comedy, drama, and martial arts mayhem from the earlier 90’s. While it’s nice to see Jet Li in a comedic leading role, Josephine Siao ends up stealing the show as Fong Sai-yuk’s irascible kung fu wielding mother.

FINAL THOUGHT:

smile

Jet Li does indeed have a lovely smile.

Paul Was Once a Degenerate Kung Fu Hipster…

Hold on to your nunchucks, because Enter the Dragon is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie poster or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring Sean “Hollywood” Hunting.

Review in a Nutshell:  A genre-blending movie that reshaped the cinematic landscape, Enter the Dragon is the film that made Bruce Lee a legend.  While parts of it may seem hokey today, the Enter the Dragon remains consistently entertaining nearly four decades after its original release.

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Magnificent Martial Violence!

Sharpen your machetes, because The Raid: Redemption is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie poster or the title above to download our review of the film,

featuring guest hosts Daryl Surat of AnimeWorldOrder and Rachel Pandich, author of Aspire.

Review in a Nutshell:  An Indonesian martial arts movie written and directed by a Welsh man, The Raid: Redemption is not just a typical action movie.  It blends drama and suspense with some of the most breath-taking and technically accomplished fight choreography in recent cinema history to create a tight, tense, thoroughly engrossing experience.

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How Mr. Miyagi Got His Groove Back

Watch out for flying net hooks, because The Karate Kid, Part II is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the DVD cover or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring Sean “Hollywood” Hunting.

Review in a Nutshell:  Although the details of the first three Karate Kid films are hopelessly muddled in our heads, we still enjoyed this entry in the series, which focuses even more on Mr. Miyagi’s character.

FINAL THOUGHT:

Curse you, ice blocks!

#1 Fist Under Heaven

Break out the theme from “Ironside”, because 5 Fingers of Death, aka King Boxer,  is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie poster or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring Sean “Hollywood” Hunting.

Review in a Nutshell:  A carefully balanced blend of drama and martial arts action, 5 Fingers of Death is the film that kick-started the kung fu film craze in America.

This movie contains:

Lieh Lo, Sans Mustache.

Hand Trauma.

The Old DVD release vs the Dragon Dynasty DVD.

Of Duty, Honor, and Scaffolding…

Lash up some bamboo scaffolding, because Return to the 36th Chamber is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie poster or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring Sean “Hollywood” Hunting.

Review in a Nutshell:  Return to the 36th Chamber is a kinder, gentler kung fu film that’s low on murder but high on comedy and creative choreography.  Included in this review is a discussion of how to find good martial arts films for fledgling kung fu fans.

This movie contains:

Wirework.

Coconut Head.

BOSS WANG.  BOSS WANG.   BOSS WANG.