The Greatest Movie EVER! Podcast
Reviewing only the finest films in the history of cinema. And robots, too.
Leaping Lizards! Godzilla vs Megalon is the Greatest Movie EVER!
(This episode features Mike Dent of r5-Central.)
This movie contains:
Awesome toys.
SPACE COCKROACHES!
Two guys and a robot.
The Moment You’ve All Been Waiting For.
COMING SOON!
+ 
= A Weapon of Last Resort
Astonishingly mediocre, The Black Cauldron may just be
The Greatest Worst Movie EVER!
This movie contains:
Generic Heroes.
The Frog / Cleavage Scene.
SATAN.
COMING SOON!
“Optimus, NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!”
Strap on your scabbards, adventurers, because
Mazes and Monsters is the Greatest (Worst?) Movie EVER!
This movie contains:
Helpful Skeletons. (“Beware the Sacrilege!”)
Crazy people.
Stupid Hats.
FINAL THOUGHT!
I hope that dragon fails its Saving Throw vs Doritos…
COMING SOON!
We’re going to keep this Satanic Death bus a-rollin’
when Chad “Winter” Clayton returns to take a stab at
The Black Cauldron.
Imitation, or Inspiration? Regardless, The Super Inframan is the Greatest Movie EVER!
This movie contains:
Hong Kong Legend, Danny Lee!
Space Vixens.
Space Vixens.
MIND BULLETS!
Thunderball Fists.
COMING SOON!
Hey, who rattled your Cage?
April Fool’s is over, and Dragonslayer is the Greatest Movie EVER!
This film contains:
Wizard Hats.
Weird Beards.
Unlikely Heroes.
Fire-breathing in Stereo.
COMING SOON!
GUNHED, standing mode!
Destroy all expectations, because Mortal Kombat: Annihilation is the Worst Movie EVER!
This film contains:
Villains with Choice Hats.
Ninjas. (Suddenly, hundreds of them.)
Red Hot Undead Mamas.
Touching Drama!
Kung Fu-wielding Dragons.
And speaking of Dragons…
COMING SOON!
Somebody call Stromnir!
Despite the fact that you could defeat the bad guys with a large can of Raid(TM),
Godzilla vs Gigan is the Greatest Movie EVER!
This movie features:
Gigan!
(In retrospect, it probably was a poor choice of words
to describe Gigan using the phrase “chicken-head”.)
Anguirus!
We root for the under-dog!
Also featuring:
Corn-wielding Hippies!
Space Roaches!
And of, course…
The Showa Era Godzilla!
CLOSING THOUGHT!
Don’t forget to show your support for forcing Mom to watch Akira.
Dungeons & Dragons is the Worst Movie EVER. (Although the `80s cartoon was pretty cool.)
2 Minutes, 49 Seconds In:
Sure, she’s hot and the steel bustier is downright sexy, but what self-respecting elf would wield a crossbow!?!
6 Minutes, 15 Seconds In:
Ridley Freeborn shops at Toys-R-Us.
6 Minutes, 33 Seconds In:
WTF?
13 Minutes, 28 Seconds In:
Clear evidence that Dungeons & Dragons is the domain of El Diablo. See Jack Chick’s “Dark Dungeons” cartoon to learn how we may combat this insidious plot to ensnare our children.
14 Minutes, 51 Second In:
The universe’s only Fat Elf.
16 Minutes, 48 Seconds In:
PURPLE HAZE / UP IN MY BRAIN!
20 Minutes, 49 Seconds In:
Tragedy strikes when the crew members realize the true horror of the Dungeons & Dragons movie…
Reign of Fire is the Greatest Worst Movie EVER. Or the Worst Greatest Movie EVER. We’re not sure.
It has dragons in it.
No, seriously. They breath fire and everything. And apparently, they wiped out the dinosaurs. All of the ones that weren’t safely sequestered in the Appatosaurus Preserve, that is.
15 Minutes, 16 Seconds In:
Getting ready for it…
Yes, folks. They even filmed it from underneath.
GO, STROMNIR, GO!!!
Sadly, shortly after this episode was recorded, the entire dinosaur population of the Appatosaurus Preserve was wiped out by an unknown assailant wielding a giant, freakin’ axe. Witnesses report that the assailant was heard shouting: “Yaaar, filthy dragons, taste the wrath of me blade!” The cryptic message “STROMNIR LIVES!” was found painted in dinosaur blood at the scene of the slaughter.
A composite sketch of the assailant, created by police artists.
The Greatest Movie EVER! Podcast 