Dragons – The Greatest Movie EVER! Podcast

R.I.P. Artax, We Hardly Knew Ye

Hold your horses, folks, because The Neverending Story is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie title or the Bluray cover above to download our review of the film, featuring Katherin the Great.

Review in a Nutshell: A weirdly existential and somewhat traumatizing West German children’s film, The Neverending Story is a cultural artifact from a very strange and very specific era of the Eighties. They say you can never go home again, and perhaps with this film, that’s true in both the literal and metaphorical senses.

Droppin’ Bombs with M.O.M.

Strap on your fur loincloth, because The Barbarians (1987) is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the title or the DVD cover above to download our review of the film, featuring M.O.M., the Mistress of Malapropisms.

Review in a Nutshell: A thoroughly generic Conan the Barbarian rip-off buoyed up by its scattershot production design and the exuberant performances of Peter and David Paul (aka the Barbarian Brothers), The Barbarians (1987) is everything I’ve ever wanted in a Cannon Film Group film directed by Ruggero Deodato.

Stomp Romp / Zilla Thrilla: Coconut Transceivers and Anguirus Shade

The Stomp Romp / Zilla Thrill theme refuses to die, unlike King Ghidorah in Destroy All Monsters, a 1968 monster-bash that was originally intended to be the final entry in the Godzilla film franchise. CLICK HERE or on the image above to download our review of the film, in which I find the pacing of the film a tad overwhelming and Mom proves herself to be a secret Anguirus-hater.

More Fun Than a Tank Full of Electric Eels. Maybe.

Lay off the anti-aircraft artillery, because Repticilus is (probably not) The Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the lobby card or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring M.O.M., the Mistress of Malapropisms.

Review in a Nutshell: A Danish / American co-production sponsored in part by American International Pictures, Reptilicus is one part giant monster movie, one part travelogue, and one part puzzling artifact of the mysteries of international productions. Apparently, in the Danish version of the film, there is at least one more musical number, and also the titular monster can fly.

FINAL THOUGHT:

This is an actual screen capture that from Reptilicus, highlighting the movie’s “spectacular” special effects.

Revenge of the Interrupting Cow.

Hold onto your magical acorns, because Willow is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie poster or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring Katherin the Great.

Review in a Nutshell: Although the story-line is pretty generic “high fantasy”, Willow holds up surprisingly well to a modern viewing thanks in no small part to the performances of its many actors (especially Warwick Davis, Val Kilmer, and Jean Marsh) and its high production values.

100% Mythologically Accurate!

Oil up your biceps and slap on your sandals, because Hercules (1983) is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie poster or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring Katherin the Great.

Review in a Nutshell: Like another film directed by Luigi Cozzi, Hercules is a visually exuberant, narratively bizarre movie filled with high concept ideas and low budget special effects. A tribute to the “peplum” films of the 1950s and 1960s, Hercules has a sort of insane charm that makes the viewing experience wonderful … as long as you don’t happen to be the younger sister of the host of the Greatest Movie EVER podcast.

This movie contains:

SPACE.

BEARS.

Not to be confused with ‘Tiny’ Lister.

We forgot to mention Gedde Watanabe.

Sharpen your daggers, because 47 Ronin is (not) the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the title or the movie poster above to download our review of the film, featuring Gerald Rathkolb of AnimeWorldOrder.

Review in a Nutshell: Combine a dubious choice of subject matter, cultural appropriation / whitewashing / racebending, an overblown budget, an unnecessary 3D post-conversion treatment, numerous delays, studio interference, a novice director, deceptive marketing, and an indifferent film-going audience and you get a recipe for disaster. As a movie, 47 Ronin is bland with a few entertaining moments, but as an exercise in how not to make a movie, it is fascinating.

Stomp Romp / Zilla Thrilla: The Not-so-Safety Dance

We’re bringing you another entry in our ongoing Godzilla-themed coverage, in which Guy Woodruff and I team up to talk about goofy dances, weird aliens, and the many and varied rumors swirling around the late Nick Adams, an actor with a colorful off-screen life. CLICK HERE or on the banner above to download our review of Invasion of Astro-Monster, better known as Godzilla vs Monster Zero.

When is a Pony not a Pony?

Saddle up, because My Little Pony: Equestria Girls is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the poster or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring Kara Dennison of conscrewDOTcom and celebrity translator Neil Nadelman.

Review in a Nutshell: It’s tough to review Equestria Girls in a vacuum since it’s not so much a standalone film as an “Elseworlds” side-story packed with heavy fan-service and inside jokes. We were all pleasantly surprised that we enjoyed it.

Stomp Romp / Zilla Thrilla: Kenny’s Misspent Youth

Godzilla’s not dead but merely resting, and we’re continuing the Godzilla theme coverage with a review of the much-reviled Godzilla’s Revenge, aka All Monsters Attack. Please note: this film contains neither Godzilla nor revenge, but it does have some harrowing things to say about the plight of latch-key children in post-industrial Tokyo. Click on the banner image or the title above to download our review of the film.