Category Archives: Greatest Movie EVER

Cage Rage: Deadfall

Hold onto your wallets, because Deadfall is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie poster or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring Zac Lowe of the “Cult It or Can It” Podcast.

Review in a Nutshell:  A stunning example of nepotism gone horribly wrong, Deadfall features Nicolas Cage at the very extreme of his lunacy.

This movie contains:

The Cage abides.

The Cage parties hard.

The Cage…

…completely…

…freaks out.

The Cage approves.

FINAL THOUGHT:

Deadfall in Five Seconds or Less.  Viewer Discretion Advised, Explicit Language ahoy!

Cage Rage: Kiss of Death

Get ready to bench-press some strippers, because Kiss of Death is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie poster or the title above to download our review of the film.

Review in a Nutshell: Kiss of Death is a shockingly well-made crime drama full of character and suspense. Look for fine performances by a host of skilled actors, including but not limited to Stanley Tucci and Samuel L. Jackson. (Also Nicolas Cage.)

This film contains:

Infinite Sunglasses?

THE CAGE IS DISPLEASED.

Some upper-middle class jerk and his glass of wine.

Makin’ Bacon

Load up your kangaroo-shootin’ rifle, because Razorback is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie poster or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring Katherine the Great.

Review in a Nutshell:  At times strangely psychedelic, Razorback is a “killer critter” horror film with some strange artistic flourishes and a rather immobile giant boar puppet.  As Katherine says, this one falls somewhere in between Jaws and Jaws: The Revenge in terms of quality.

This movie contains:

Grandpa RAGE!

Typical Australian Hospitality.

There’s a giant rampaging boar hidden somewhere in this picture.  Can you spot it?

Cage Rage: Fire Birds

Hide your periscopes and ladies underwear, because Fire Birds is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie poster or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring Eeeper of the Eeeper’s Choice Podcast.

Review in a Nutshell:  Fire Birds tries to be Top Gun with helicopters instead of fighter jets and South American drug lords instead of the U.S.S.R.  It doesn’t really work, but did you just see that freakin’ chopper explode?

This movie contains:

Bored Cage.

Sulky Cage.

 

Sleazy Cage.

 

Trust us, it’s for SCIENCE!

FINAL THOUGHT:

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!

Remembering when Max wasn’t Quite so Mad

Fire up the dune buggy, because The Road Warrior is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie poster or the title above to download our review of the film.

Review in a Nutshell:  The Road Warrior is a genre-defining action film with an influence in both look and execution that cannot be understated.  It also has some of the best car-chase scenes captured on film.

This movie contains:

Lord Humungus, Rockin’ the Mic.

Vernon Wells, The Definition of Post-Apocalypse Thuggery.

Oh yeah, Mel Gibson was in this, too.

This Time It Really is “Drink Your Vegetables.”

Don’t spare the bologna sandwiches, because Troll 2 is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie poster or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring Sean “Hollywood” Hunting.

Review in a Nutshell:   Wooden acting, cheap special effects, ridiculous fairy-tale logic, and crew of crazy Italians…it all adds up to one of the most awesomely bad movies in cinema history!

This movie contains:

Ghosts.

Goblins.

Delicious Vegan Cuisine.

Oh – oh dear God, no!  Just no!  DO NOT WANT!

FINAL THOUGHT:

OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!

Cage Rage: Face / Off

Break out the matched pistols, because Face / Off is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click the poster or the movie title above to download our review of the film, featuring Daryl Surat of AnimeWorldOrder and Ken Nabbe, aka the Internet’s Joey Snackpants.

Review in a Nutshell:  Face / Off is the American film that best showcases John Woo’s eccentricities and directorial flourishes.  Whether that’s a complement or a criticism depends on how you feel about John Woo.

The movie contains:

The Mustache of Champions.

Crazy Cage Face.

Likewise.

A Box of Treasures.

Oh yeah, there’s something about face transplants, too.

We Live to Rock!

Get ready to tune your weapons, because Rock ‘n’ Roll Nightmare is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie poster or the title above to download our review of the film.

Review in a Nutshell:  Rock ‘n’ Roll Nightmare is an astounding combination of eighties metal, demonic horror, and a third secret ingredient that makes this movie a low-budget mind-blower.  Do not miss this film!

ERRATA:  Jon Mikl Thor was in a movie called Zombie Nightmare, not “Zombie Massacre”, and he was on the Merv Griffin Show, not the Johnny Carson Show.  We needed to clear that up.

This film contains:

The Eighties.

WTF?

FINAL THOUGHT:

WE LIVE TO ROCK!

Cage Rage: Honeymoon in Vegas

What happens in Vegas stays in Hawaii, because Honeymoon in Vegas is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie cover or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring the return of GME! original co-host, Katherine the Great.

Review in a Nutshell:  Properly channeled, Nic Cage’s manic energy makes for surprisingly funny comedic viewing.  Honeymoon in Vegas is a genuinely fun viewing experience full of familiar faces and outlandish situations.

This movie contains:

Crazy Cage Face.

Nic Cage, Master of Disguise.

The Flying Elvises.

God Bless Uwe Boll Part III: Not LotR, Srsly

Break out the boomerangs, because In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale, aka Jason Statham Rides a Horse and Kills People, is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie poster or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring guest co-host Daryl Surat of AnimeWorldOrder.

Review in a Nutshell:  Uwe Boll has an amazing gift to take any film of any genre and any budget-level and transform it into a clattering wreck of ineptitude punctuated with moments of actual competance.  In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale is no exception, and might possibly be Boll’s magnum opus.