Category Archives: Commando

Ax Dancing, Sexy Robots, Rambo, Red Sonja?

Remember to eat your fruit and vegetables, because Cobra is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie poster or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring guest host Daryl Surat of AnimeWorldOrder.

Review in a Nutshell:  There are some movies that define an era, embedding themselves in the fabric of popular media and influencing later films for decades to come.  And there are films like Cobra, which encapsulate the craziest elements of an entire period in film and then are promptly, tragically forgotten.

This movie contains:

Killer Nerds?

Practical Solutions in Cutlery.

Fast Food Atrocities.

Sexy Robots?

FINAL THOUGHT:

Behold, the infamous music video montage!

Robot Rumble in the Jungle

Set up your hilarious jungle booby-traps, because Solo is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie poster or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring Sean “Hollywood” Hunting.

Review in a Nutshell:  Solo may have a cliche premise (“creating the ultimate super-soldier”), but the movie is well-acted and well-executed.  It’s got great stunts, solid special effects, and an interesting setting, too.  Also, Adrien Brody!?!

Cage Rage: Fire Birds

Hide your periscopes and ladies underwear, because Fire Birds is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie poster or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring Eeeper of the Eeeper’s Choice Podcast.

Review in a Nutshell:  Fire Birds tries to be Top Gun with helicopters instead of fighter jets and South American drug lords instead of the U.S.S.R.  It doesn’t really work, but did you just see that freakin’ chopper explode?

This movie contains:

Bored Cage.

Sulky Cage.

 

Sleazy Cage.

 

Trust us, it’s for SCIENCE!

FINAL THOUGHT:

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!

Fat Man in Trenchcoat with Sword, Killing Vampires

Hold onto your viscera, because Against the Dark is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Review in a Nutshell:  A messy, straight-to-DVD action / horror movie, Against the Dark begs the question:  Which is the real lumbering, undead monster?  A vampire?  Or Steven Seagal’s career?

John Cena loves Explosions

Strap on your explosion-proof T-shirt, because The Marine is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Review in a Nutshell:  The Marine is a throwback to an earlier era in action movies, when the heroes were nigh-invulnerable and the mayhem was constant.  I wouldn’t have it any other way.

This photo demonstrates both John Cena’s incredible ‘Angry Face’ and his initiative in creative war-paint design.

“It’s Not OVAH!”

The Greatest Movie EVER!

Strap on your combat boots, because First Blood is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Sorry, no show notes this time.

I can’t make screen-caps off of Blu-Ray DVDs

that I watch on my SUPER SEXY PS3!

COMING SOON!

Okay, kiddies, you have three options.

Do you want me to upload Resident Evil: Extinction, Flight of the Navigator, or Appleseed: Ex Machina next? Leave feedback to let me know.

It’s like a Choose Your Own Adventure(TM) Book!

We fight for Love.


The long-promised Commando podcast is finally here, and Commando is the Greatest GREATEST Movie EVER. Featuring Daryl Surat from AnimeWorldOrder, and Dave and Joel from Fast Karate for the Gentleman, this podcast clocks in at just under forty-six and a half minutes, making it the longest podcast yet. But that’s only because it was nigh-impossible to curb Daryl’s enthusiasm for Arnold’s rippling man-muscles.

 

Arnold-as-Civilian…

Arnold-as-Commando…

I think I see a pattern here.

 

7 Minutes, 28 Seconds In:
Double-Billing!
Bill Paxton.

Bill Duke.

 

30 Minutes, 1 Second In:

Invoking his power as the avatar of Raoh, King of Fists, Daryl lays some nerd-slap down upon the Almighty Gooberzilla. But fear not, intrepid listeners. A later slip involving other popular eighties movies allows me to regain face.

 

38 Minutes, 16 Seconds In:
Why Vernon Wells deserves an Academy Award:




Ah, it’s good to be alive.