The Greatest Movie EVER! Podcast
Reviewing only the finest films in the history of cinema. And robots, too.
Strap on your plastic educators, because Forbidden Planet is
The Greatest Movie EVER!
This movie contains:
Flying Saucers.
Leslie Nielsen, Space Commando.
Sirens from Beyond the Stars.
Invisible Monsters. (You can’t see it. It’s invisible.)
FALSE ADVERTISING!
COMING SOON!
Celebrating 101 and consecutive podcasts, we’re bringing it for real, yo.
Hold on to your fishing hats, because Paycheck is the Worst Movie EVER!
This movie contains:
MIND LASERS.
Fisherman Hats.
Mexican Stand-Offs.
And that brings an end to the Big Month of Dick. Thanks for listening!
Which makes me wonder what is COMING SOON?
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Don’t have a schizoid embolism, because Total Recall is the Greatest Movie EVER!
This film contains:
MISOGYNY.
Prosthetic Heads.
WAY COOL CG!
The Future Mrs. Sean “Hollywood” Hunting.
COMING SOON!
Chicks dig dudes with good skills.
Trust nobody, because Impostor is the Greatest Movie EVER!
(And also the Worst Movie EVER!)
This movie contains:
Gary Sinise.
Vincent D’Onofrio.
Torture.
(Er, I mean “Geneva Convention Sanctioned Interrogation Techniques.”)
PARANOIA.
Keith David Impersonators.
Big Mutherin’ Explosions.
COMING SOON!
Turtle Recall?
If only we could have foreseen
that Next is the Worst Movie EVER.
This movie contains:
The Cage.
The Cage.
The Cage.
Oh yeah. Jessica Biel is in it, too.
This movie does not contain:
Golden Men.
COMING SOON!
I bet those groin-seeking lasers are making Spencer Olham a trifle nervous…
My brain may be muddled, but is A Scanner Darkly
the Greatest Movie EVER?
This film contains:
DRUGS DRUGS DRUGS.
Paranoia.
Burned-out Hippies.
Keanu.
Alien Weirdos.
COMING SOON!
The Cage wonders what might be coming Next…
It begins with scream, not a whimper
because Screamers is the Greatest Movie EVER!
This film contains:
Peter Weller, a king among actors.
Fragile people in bad situations.
Knife-licking Psychos.
TRUE LOVE?
UNDEAD ROBOT DINOSAURS FROM HELL.
Next up on the Big Month of Dick…
Keanu has had better days…
Monitor your greenhouse gas emissions, because
Solar Attack is the Greatest Movie EVER!
This movie contains:
An Angry Mr. Sun.
Lou Gossett Jr, President of the USA.
\
Nuclear Wessels.
SUPER SCIENCE!
COMING SOON!
Philip K. in the Hizzie!
(Special thanks to LCom for designing our banner.)
Fear the Gooberzilla’s foam-flecked fanboy ravings, because
Transformers: The Movie is the Greatest Movie EVER!
See Also:
This movie contains:
Pink Robots.
AAAAAGH! ROBO-SQUID!!!
He turns into a motorcycle. Please no ‘handlebar’-related jokes.
TRAUMA.
CLOSING THOUGHT!
Where’s Hajime Sorayama when you need him?
COMING SOON:
I think we need to keep reviewing films that are just right for the whole family to consume…
PERFECT!
Despite the presence of Chris Tucker, The Fifth Element is the Greatest Movie EVER!
This movie contains:
Tiny Lister, Space President.
Space Ducks.
Space Orcs.
The most annoying man in the galaxy.
Oh, yeah, Milla’s in it, too. (MULTI-PASS!)
COMING SOON!
You know, a little Noxzema could clear that up…
