Greatest Movie EVER – Page 44 – The Greatest Movie EVER! Podcast

“Did that Robot have a Mustache?”

Fear the Gooberzilla’s foam-flecked fanboy ravings, because

Transformers: The Movie is the Greatest Movie EVER!

See Also:

This movie contains:

RC, my robo-crush.

Pink Robots.

MADNESS!

AAAAAGH! ROBO-SQUID!!!

He turns into a motorcycle. Please no ‘handlebar’-related jokes.

Optimus Dies.

TRAUMA.

CLOSING THOUGHT!

Kinky.

Where’s Hajime Sorayama when you need him?

COMING SOON:

I think we need to keep reviewing films that are just right for the whole family to consume…

COMING SOON!

PERFECT!

Labyrinths and Lollipops?

Strap on your scabbards, adventurers, because

Mazes and Monsters is the Greatest (Worst?) Movie EVER!

This movie contains:

Some have mystical powers.

Helpful Skeletons. (“Beware the Sacrilege!”)

Tom Hank's is losin' it.

Crazy people.

Man. that's a stupid hat.

Stupid Hats.

FINAL THOUGHT!

I hope that dragon fails its Saving Throw vs Doritos…

COMING SOON!

COMING SOON.

We’re going to keep this Satanic Death bus a-rollin’

when Chad “Winter” Clayton returns to take a stab at

The Black Cauldron.

The Horror within the Blur

Some spoilers ahead, so watch the movie first,

because Jacob’s Ladder is the Greatest Movie EVER!

This movie contains:

How can he operate with no eyes?

SILENT HILL.

Ludovig treatment?

SILENT HILL.

Yeesh, that's freaky.

SILENT HILL.

ERRATA:

Pruitt Taylor Vince’s medical condition is actually called “Nystagmus”.
The Jezebel of the Old Testament was a worshiper of Baal. The Jezebel mentioned in the New Testament was the sexually promiscuous one.

COMING SOON!

COMING SOON!

Katherine is going to feel my pain…

“Wolfman’s got Nards.”

Packed to the brim with yummy eighties goodness,

The Monster Squad is the Greatest Movie EVER!

This movie contains:

Dracula is a Pimp.

Dracula.

Hair Face Chippendale?

The Wolf-Man. (AWOOOOOO!)

Ignatius T. Gillman, Esq.

The Creature from the Black Lagoon.

Insert 'Mummy' Pun here.

The Mummy.

Kodak is bogus?

Frankenstein’s Monster.

This movie also contains:

My role model.

Don't mess with Fat Kid.

Children with a staunch belief in the Second Amendment.

COMING SOON!
Tim Robbins in Jacob's Ladder

Tim Robbins has issues…

It’s like ‘Love, Actually’…with Zombies

Despite the protests of some sissy zombie-haters,

Slither is the Greatest Movie EVER!

This movie contains:

Poke it with a stick!

The rules of Alien Diplomacy.

Aw, how sweet.

Tender Alien Romance.

Nate Filion, Ultra-Hero.

Heroics.

Family Fun Day!

Friendly Zombies.

“Multi-Pass!”

Despite the presence of Chris Tucker, The Fifth Element is the Greatest Movie EVER!

This movie contains:

Tiny Lister, Space President.

Tiny Lister, Space President.

Robo Daffy?

Space Ducks.

Which way to Mordor?

Space Orcs.

Chris Tucker as Ruby Rhod.

The most annoying man in the galaxy.

Milla Jovovich as Leeloo

Oh, yeah, Milla’s in it, too. (MULTI-PASS!)

COMING SOON!

Grant Grant?

You know, a little Noxzema could clear that up…

Savage White Guy Atavism

It’s mutant bears all day, every day, in this remarkably family unfriendly film.

That’s right, Prophecy is the Greatest Movie EVER!

This film contains:

Rugged!

Rugged Man-beards.

He likes it?

Dog Bondage.

Armand Assante, Native American!

Armand Assante, Native American!

GRAAAAR!

Owl Bears.

COMING SOON!

COMING SOON!

Oh noes, more Milla!

Karate Invasion! “Did you see her triceps?”

For those of you who didn’t get enough Fast Karate this Saturday,

Strange Days is the Greatest Movie EVER.

This podcast contains:

We will crush them yet!

Those Dino-hatin’ outlaws, Dave and Joel.

This movie contains:

Hit it. Quit it.

The lovely Angela Bassett and the less-than-lovely Juliette Lewis.

This movie also contains:

Tim Sizemore in Strange Days.

Knife to a Gunfight.

Fabulous hair-styles.

COMINGS SOON!

COMING SOON!

“WOLVERINES!”

“Jonathan, Jonathan, Jonathan!”

Not to be confused with its lackluster remake,

Rollerball (1975) is the Greatest Movie EVER!

This movie contains:

A leather glove with spikes on it.

Cesti. (Oooh, good Vocab word.)

Hitchcock!?!

Alfred Hitchcock Impersonators.

Larry?

Stylin’ Seventies Fashion.

Coma-inducing Concussions.

Ghost Ride the Ugly Puppy

Although the blood-feud between Katherine and Mom continues,

Ghost Rider is the Greatest Movie EVER!

This movie contains:

Young Johnny.

Matt Long as Young Johnny.

Adult Johnny.

“The Cage” as Fully Grown Johnny.

OMG THEY COULD BE TWINS!

This movie also contains:

Devil-Kid need Hug?

Sideburn sporting Emo Devil-babies.

BOO!

Crazy Laugh!

CRAZY LAUGH!

Nicholas Cage, Master Thespian!

COMING SOON!

COMING SOON!

Obey the Fist.