Grab your zombie-bashing stick, because
House of the Dead is the ‘Greatest’ Movie EVER!
Show Notes to follow. Sleep now.
God Bless Uwe Boll 2: Electric Zombie Boogaloo
Category Archives: Horror
Langustino, Scared to Death?
Scream for you lives, because The Tingler is the Greatest Movie EVER!
This movie contains:
Shadow Puppets.
Deaf, mute, obsessive-compulsive hemophobes.
Vincent Price, totally freakin’ out, Man!
COMING SOON!
In February, we will Hunt You Like an Animal, for it is The Most Dangerous Month!
Hong Kong Shotgun, anyone?
The Reason for the Season is…Demons?
Have a squishy Yuletide season, because
Demon Knight is the Greatest Movie EVER!
This movie contains:
BILLY ZANE.
BILLY ZANE.
BILLY ZANE.
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!
Love, Hate, and Graboids.
Watch out for bad vibrations, because Tremors is the Greatest Movie EVER!
This movie contains:
Kevin Bacon.
A match made in Heaven.
Cute but Approachable Seismologists.
GRABOIDS!
This podcast contains:
Beautiful Guest Hosts.
This podcast DOES NOT contain:
Daryl “I dislike Kevin Bacon” Surat!
Hornswoggled!?!
Watch out for the naughty tentacles, because
The Host is the Worst Movie EVER!
This film contains:
Motiveless Villainy.
Dedicated Civil Servants Protecting the Public…kinda…
Idiots.
Oh yeah, there’s a Monster in here, somewhere.
CLOSING THOUGHT!
What watching this movie feels like:
TORTURE!
COMING SOON!
If only there were something that could wash
the awful taste of this pitiful excuse
for a Monster Movie out of my mouth…
OH WAIT, THERE IS!
The Horror within the Blur
Some spoilers ahead, so watch the movie first,
because Jacob’s Ladder is the Greatest Movie EVER!
This movie contains:
SILENT HILL.
SILENT HILL.
SILENT HILL.
ERRATA:
- Pruitt Taylor Vince’s medical condition is actually called “Nystagmus”.
- The Jezebel of the Old Testament was a worshiper of Baal. The Jezebel mentioned in the New Testament was the sexually promiscuous one.
COMING SOON!
Katherine is going to feel my pain…
“Wolfman’s got Nards.”
Packed to the brim with yummy eighties goodness,
The Monster Squad is the Greatest Movie EVER!
This movie contains:
Dracula.
The Wolf-Man. (AWOOOOOO!)
The Creature from the Black Lagoon.
The Mummy.
Frankenstein’s Monster.
This movie also contains:
Children with a staunch belief in the Second Amendment.
COMING SOON!
Tim Robbins has issues…
It’s like ‘Love, Actually’…with Zombies
Despite the protests of some sissy zombie-haters,
Slither is the Greatest Movie EVER!
This movie contains:
The rules of Alien Diplomacy.
Tender Alien Romance.
Heroics.
Friendly Zombies.
Savage White Guy Atavism
It’s mutant bears all day, every day, in this remarkably family unfriendly film.
That’s right, Prophecy is the Greatest Movie EVER!
This film contains:
Rugged Man-beards.
Dog Bondage.
Armand Assante, Native American!
Owl Bears.
COMING SOON!
Oh noes, more Milla!
Mazes and Monsters (Not Really)
All joking aside, Pan’s Labyrinth is the Greatest Movie EVER!
This movie includes:
Exploding Giant Toads.
Fauns and other fairy woodland creatures.
Peer pressure.
Ofelia: “This’ll make me cool, right?”
Pan: “Yeah, baby, the first one’s free.”
PEEK-A-BOO!
CLOSING THOUGHT!
Okay, that’s enough darkness and depression for a while.
After all…
Guillermo just wants to make you smile.
COMING SOON!
Why is Frank Dux so upset? Tune in and find out!
The Greatest Movie EVER! Podcast 