“Merry Christmas, You Filthy Man-Animals!”

Attach those alien nose-plugs, because Battlefield Earth is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie poster or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring guest cohost Max Dunn.

Review in a Nutshell:  Listen up, rat-brain!  Just because a movie has an incomprehensible plot, hammy acting, ridiculous dialog, and goofy special effects does not mean it’s not the Greatest Movie EVER!  Get that through your skull-bone!

Fun Fact:

The “sharpened log fence” is actually called a “stockade”.

Rock `Em Sock `Em Robots, Redux

Strap on your bicycle helmets, because Robot Wars is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the poster or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring special guest host Andrew from Collection DX and The Veef Show.

Review in a Nutshell:  A straight-to-video science fiction film with a simple premise and a shoe-string budget, Robot Wars does a lot with very little.  The stop-motion animation and laser effects are especially good.

This movie contains:

A giant robot.

Captain Marion McJerkypants.

Asian Tourists with Laser Cameras.

HOLY CRAP, ANOTHER GIANT ROBOT!  Who could have predicted that?

Bonus Content: Avengers Assemble!

Time for some more kiddy cartoons!

CLICK HERE or on the image above to download a bonus episode in which Sean “Hollywood” Hunting and I gush all over Avengers: Earth’s Mightiest Heroes.

Review in a Nutshell:  Avengers is one of only a handful of Marvel animated properties that does justice to the source material.  It’s a great animated series that can be enjoyed by children of all ages, with sharp writing and strong characterization.

FINAL THOUGHT:

The theme song is @#$%ing terrible, though.

Bad Highlander, starring the Worst Highlander

Break out the katanas and the rocking guitar solos, because Highlander: The Search for Vengeance is (probably not) the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie poster or the title above to download our review of the film, featuing Sean “Hollywood” Hunting.

Review in a Nutshell:  Beautifully animated but structurally crippled, Highlander: The Search for Vengeance is still not the worst Highlander property, even if Colin MacCleod is hands-down the worst Highlander.  Paul blames the script; Sean blames the director.  A fabulous time is had by all.

This movie contains:

Chainsaw-wielding Cannibal Mutants.

Druid Ghosts.

Nice Mullet, Jerk.

Sweet Lovin’, Eighties Style.

FINAL THOUGHT:

The best thing to result from this anime.

“You like Pi? Stop being IRRATIONAL. HAW HAW HAW!”

Put down that electric drill, because Pi is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the poster or the movie title above to download our review of the film, featuring Sean “Hollywood” Hunting.

Review in a Nutshell:  A harrowing tale of mathematics and madness, Pi juggles such diverse elements as cyberpunk and Jewish mysticism to make a taut psychological thriller.

God Bless Uwe Boll IV: Fat Man vs Meatball Sandwich

Watch out for gray-painted super soldiers, because Far Cry is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie poster or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring Jeff “Rich Lather” Tatarek of the Lather’s Blather Podcast.

Review in a Nutshell:  Filled with solid action sequences crippled by incompetent camerawork and bad editing, Far Cry is half good film, half Uwe Boll disaster.  On the other hand, did you see that freaking chopper explode?

Curse You, Euclid!

Hold onto your boots, because Cube Zero is definitely not the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie poster or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring Sean “Hollywood” Hunting.

Review in a Nutshell:  Hopelessly crippled by ridiculous writing and bad ideas, Cube Zero takes a decent little science fiction / horror series and piledrives it into the pavement.  Its badness has to be seen to be believed.

“Cyberpunk? NAJICA!?!”

Jack into your virtual reality headset, because Johnny Mnemonic is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the poster or the movie title above to download our review of the film, featuring Dave and Joel from Fast Karate for the Gentleman.

Review in a Nutshell:  Johnny Mnemonic is a poor adaptation with a surprisingly high number of hilarious things going on it.  It’s proof positive that some authors should not be allowed to adapt their own work.

This movie contains:

The Internet!

Udo Kier, being Udo Kier.

“Send you down to Rikerth, wear an orange jumpthuit!”

Dr. Henry Rollins, Cybersurgeon Extraordinaire.

FINAL THOUGHT:

Johnny Mnemonic, the Highlight Reel.

Aim for the Nerve Cluster!

Get ready to abuse some innocent fishmen, because ARENA is the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the movie cover or the title above to download our review of the film, featuring Sean “Hollywood” Hunting.

Review in a Nutshell:  Did you see that guy just punch that giant rubber space lizard in the face?  Did you?  BECAUSE I SURE DID!

Spice World, Ell Oh Ell

Strap in your noseplugs, because Dune (1984) is (definitely not) the Greatest Movie EVER!

Click on the poster or the movie title above to download our review of the film, featuring Sean “Hollywood” Hunting.

Review in a Nutshell:  Ugly and incomprehensible, the David Lynch version of Dune is a muddled mess that lacks even the redeeming qualities of David Lynch’s usual cinematic weirdness.  On the plus side, Sting in a Thong!

This movie contains:

Phallic Symbols.

STINGINATHONG!  STINGINATHONG!  STINGINATHONG!

Ummm…what the heck is going on here?