Reviewing only the finest films in the history of cinema. And robots, too.
Fire up your flame-thrower, because John Carpenter’s The Thing is the Greatest Movie EVER!
Click on the movie poster or the link above to download our review of the film.
Review in a Nutshell: Brimming over with gore and paranoia, John Carpenter’s The Thing is a pessimistic vision and a luminary example of the science fiction / horror subgenre.
COMING SOON!
“You fool! My kung fu is best!”
Signaling the triumphant return of the Greatest Movie EVER! Podcast to uploading new content, we kick off the migration to the new hosting service with three movie reviews for the price of none!
Click here or click the picture above to download a podcast that examines Crank, Crank 2: High Voltage, and Gamer.
WARNING: This podcast contains dangerous levels of bleeped-out words and Daryl Surat.
Reviews in a Nutshell: Jason Statham drives a car and kills people. Gerard Butler does, too.
Click here if you wish to see the image that encapsulates the entirety of the Crank mythos.
This image is spoiler-iffic and not very polite. Viewer discretion is advised.
The Greatest Movie EVER! Podcast is in the process of moving to a new hosting service, one that can handle the kind of traffic that we attract. This process is going to be a bit painful and will take a while to complete. I have to re-upload all of the episodes to Libsyn, and there are limits on the number of files I can upload per month. Until the switch-over is complete, there will be a lot of broken links, and the Archives page will be disabled. Some of the podcasts will still be available for download through the updated RSS feed, but some will give 404 File Not Found errors.
UPDATE: The Archives are now arranged alphabetically and feature all of the episodes that are currently uploaded and working. All links in the WordPress weblog postings are still broken.
We will have everything up eventually, and we’ll still be trying to update with new content during the process. We appreciate your patience during this difficult move.
Sincerely,
-Gooberzilla and the GME! Podcast Crew
Break out those exploding shurikens, because Rage of Honor is (definitely not) the Greatest Movie EVER!
Click on the movie poster or the title above to download the review.
Review in a Nutshell: Crippled by terrible camera-work and Sho Kosugi’s broken Engrish, Rage of Honor is not an ideal ninja movie. Still, we at the Greatest Movie EVER! Podcast are thankful for ninja movies in general.
This movie contains:
FALSE ADVERTISING!
Sho Kosugi, Gentleman Spy.
Camo-Pajama Jesus Ninjas.
Break out the bibs and butter, because Godzilla vs the Sea Monster is the Greatest Movie EVER!
Click on the movie poster or the title above to download the review.
Review in a Nutshell: Godzilla hackey-sacks with a giant shrimp. What more do you want?
This movie contains:
You don’t have to be evil to sport an eyepatch, but it helps.
JUMBO SHRIMP!
Is that Godzilla, or a Stoned Cookie Monster?
ERRATA: “They Shoot Horses, Don’t They?” was actually released in 1969, so Godzilla vs the Sea Monster was actually blazing trails.
Conga to the beat of the steel-drums, mon, because Weekend at Bernies II is the Greatest (Worst) Movie EVER!
Click the poster or the movie title to download the review.
Review in a Nutshell: Remember Nietzsche? That whole gazing into the Abyss, the Abyss gazes into you thing? He was talking about this movie.
This movie contains:
Bernie.
Voodoo Mind Control.
We completely neglected to mention Barry Bostwick.
Pack up your sleeping bags, because Sleepaway Camp is the Greatest Movie EVER!
Luke “The Sasquatch” White is our guest camp-counselor on this slice of summer camp horror. Please click the poster or the movie title to download the review.
Review in a Nutshell: Thanks to clever directing and several symbolic artistic flourishes, Sleepaway Camp remains a shocking experience more than a quarter-century after its initial release. It’s a rare example of a horror movie with a disturbing exploration of a theme.
This movie contains:
The Look.
Burn Work.
The Arrow Gag.
GRAAAARGHR!
COMING SOON!
Our Secret Halloween Theme concludes with the most horrifying zombie movie ever made.
Get out the Geiger counter, because C.H.U.D. is the Greatest Movie EVER!
Review in a Nutshell: A cheesy horror film from the early eighties, C.H.U.D. succeeds thanks to solid performances from the cast, strong editing, and a psychologically-oppressive atmosphere. The rubber monster suits help, too.
This movie contains:
Crazy Homeless People.
Grumpy Frumpy Face.
The mutation makes your eyes all glowy…
FINAL THOUGHT!
Producer Andrew Bonime’s response to the C.H.U.D. DVD commentary can be found here.
Drag out your coffin, because Django is the Greatest Movie EVER!
Review in a Nutshell: A morally ambiguous spaghetti-western, Django has been hugely influential on the genre. Its grim setting and spontaneous bursts of violence are still entertaining despite decades of imitators cribbing from the film.
Strap on your sandals, because Conan the Destroyer is the Greatest Movie EVER!
Review in a Nutshell: It may not have James Earl Jones, but it has Grace Jones, and I think that more than makes up for it, thank you very much.
This movie contains:
Ahnold’s Hypno-Face.
Constipated Wizards.
Grace Jones being Crazy.
GORILLA WIZARD GHOSTS.
Addendum: Scouring the Internet has uncovered this picture, evidence that suggests that Andre the Giant was in the fact the man in the Dagoth suit.
The Greatest Movie EVER! Podcast 
